Choose YOU!

Sometimes we struggle with choosing ourselves, with making ourselves a priority. We spend time making sure that our friends and families are okay, but don’t leave enough of that energy for ourselves. Meanwhile, everyone is doing fantastic, and you’re home dealing with your own stress, depleted of energy and any motivation.

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Whether its out of obligation, fear of not being liked, or just simply conditioned to being that “go to” or “strong” person we continue to allow ourselves to fall further and further on our to do list. We make excuses and justify our continued mistreatment of ourselves, and then you look up and find yourself irritable, angry, resentful, or just plain ole’ tired!

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So…I know you’re wondering…How do I fix it? Well, simply put you just have too….

CHOOSE YOU!

So what does that look like exactly? Well it requires you to make yourself a priority, and remember to take care of yourself before you take care of those around you. We’ve all heard the announcement on the airplane when we travel. In case of an emergency, face masks will drop down, and you must put your mask on first before you go and help others. Apply that to your life. If you don’t have your mask on, you are going to run out of air, and won’t be able to help those around you! So here are some things you can do. Grab your pen and pad!

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  • Set boundaries

  • Say No (Its not a bad word)

  • Focus on YOUR goals (you have dreams too)

  • Remove toxic relationships and people (you deserve better)

  • Trust your instincts (You know yourself better than you think!)

  • Speak Kindly to yourself, speaking loving to yourself, and think positively about yourself (you show people how to treat you!)

  • Engage in frequent self-care (you have to refill your cup)

So, now that you have some tips, go forth, be great, and CHOOSE YOU! It is okay to be selfish and deciding to take time for yourself, to focus on your well being, and to put yourself first.

Anxiety Woes

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Anxiety is defined as a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. When anxiety becomes severe or problematic is when it begins to impede and interfere with your daily functioning. 

The thing about anxiety is…it looks different for everyone. It can present itself in the form of always needing control, crying and difficulty managing your emotions, constantly feeling agitated and angry, and it can even show up as physical symptoms from stomachaches, headaches, sweaty palms, or increased heart rate.

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Anxiety can also come with unwanted thoughts, emotional distress, and an unsettled mind. And lets face it we are coming into the holiday seasons, where you are expected to be joyful, thankful, and around family, whether your family is functional or dysfunctional like most, there tend to come some anxious thoughts that are associated with preparing for this time of year. So, what can you do about that? Let me tell you…

Question your thoughts & evaluate your thinking and feelings. Ask yourself is this true? Has this happened? Review the possible outcomes of the events that’s causing the anxiety and identify ways to cope to those outcomes. Typically this allows you to recognize a number of outcomes and usually find that things are not as bad as our anxious mind makes them. 

You can also engage in deep breathing? How you say? Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes, inhale for 5 seconds, hold for 6 seconds, and exhale for 7 seconds, and do this repeatedly, until you feel calm.

Another technique that we use often with our clients is what we call grounding. If you find yourself experiencing a heightened level of anxiety you can stop what you are doing, and do the grounding technique called 5-4-3-2-1. In that moment you look around you and find 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. And repeated this technique as necessary until you feel calm. 

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Whether you suffer from anxiety or know someone who does, just remember to be kind to your self and be kind to others. The seasons are approaching and there are so many of us who experience anxiety, depression, sadness, and all out frustration. But know that by utilizing the techniques above, building that support system, or reaching out to a therapist, you will get through these rough times. 

And if you need to reach out please feel free to contact TRCC, we are here to help. 

Happy coping!